Saturday, January 8, 2011

My Past Writings

Blood to Dust


Oh my mangled body as it juts through the transparent surface of my drenched clothing! My threads, drenched with the blood of my parents, my ancestors and my forefathers. My pallid skin, drenched in salty sweat as it fills all the crevasse and curvatures of my body. My sallow countenance, moist from tears that fell from my now unseeing eyes, crackled like a dry leaf blown to pieces by the wind. Unseeing eyes, that can no longer convey turmoil or ecstasy, will never enjoy the cornucopia of colors in the wind and shall never bare witness to the myriad vignettes of life, stares blankly forward, to the non-existent future. My hair, strewn, spread amidst the concrete where my head is juxtaposed to; lay stiff like dark ropes, rough ropes that could never hold anything together.

Oh cold wind! Bring along with you the memory of what it once was. In malicious mirth, slice into the deep angry red cuts of my wounds. Laugh unconscionably! Snigger with all your might! Howl with intense hilarity like a vicious animal! As loud as you might think it is, it will never stir me up for your ululation will fall into unhearing ears.

Oh gray dust! You materialized out from nowhere! As you kiss my eyes, feel the slowly drying tears that once dwelled in my eyelids. As you enter my nostrils, feel free to reach my heart; fill my hushed lungs with your presence. From outside, embrace me tightly until you hear my bones crackle with your magnitude.

Oh moonlight! Sing me a lullaby in perpetuity. Cradle me to sleep.


Starry Night


Last night, I plucked a couple of stars in the evening sky and stuffed them in my pocket. Who knows, time may come when I will need the company of the stars to join me in the celebration of my melancholy. They will be my guiding light if I decide to walk along the cobblestones towards the gazebo where I store my innermost desires. They will shine the same path if I decide to go back home. During the wakefulness of my nights, I worry sometimes. What if I run out of stars to pluck? Who will accompany me in paying tribute to my solitary existence? Are stars like trees, can they be made to grow in replacement of the others that I took? I just hope that I won’t live for a million years; I would prefer the paucity of happiness than the scarcity of stars.

As I lament the celebration of my seclusion, I felt the stillness of the night weep in silent resonance. Its sob was the hushed wind that blew my tears away. My tears together with the night’s was the mist fogging my vision as I stare forward, looking on as the story of my life slowly unfolds.

From the sky above, the stars shone brightly and from its corner, one drops from the precipice into the horizon.


Entreaty to the Sun


As the burning coals of my hatred bare witness to my fervent supplications in summoning the heavens to open their gates and listen to my plea, I raise up my hands while I kneel before you Oh Most Powerful Lord of the Sun! Take away my eye sight with the intensity of your luminescence! Let me hear nothing but your persistent clamor for singeing hearts that were frozen with apathy and non-existentialism! Rip off my tender limbs as you set the dark macabre labyrinths of my soul ablaze! Breathe in my ashes as I soar up to be one with you; let me be your penumbra when you wish to rest.

Allow my tears to flow freely; let the valley of despair be washed away, further away until they can’t inflict themselves to anyone, besmudging otherwise virginal spirits. Allow the deafening intensity of my weeping to rumble unto vast plains and break through adamant mountains. Send in your great blasts of fireballs and pulverize granites into embers; let them be conveyed by the wind.

Oh Great Wind! Carry me in your immense shoulders towards the Sun. May the parched lips of my countenance be the receptacle for the never-ending inferno of your visage. Let my widespread arms catch your inevitable blaze for the entire world to see.

Oh Most Powerful Lord of the Sun I entreat you my deepest supplications. Take me with you!

Reverberations

Tap… Tap… Tap…
You here the resonance of leather as it touched wood. Or was it rubber as it touched cement? Whatever!, you say. You can hear it clearly as you hear the rumblings of your heart.

Thud… Thud… Thud…
Every beat bounces back and beyond within the empty walls of your chest, echoing within the labyrinths of your soul. You clench your chest with your fists pounding on it like rocks fitfully slammed against a wall, half wishing for the beating to stop, half hoping for the beating to perpetually go on. You gulped mouthfuls of air until your chest aches. Until you hear the resonance of the leather pouncing on wood gradually increase its sound before you realize they were your own.

Whoosh… Whoosh… Whoosh…
The wind mocks you as it laughed in malicious mirth as you ran away from it. No one can ever outrun me!, it says. But you ran nonetheless and the wind chased you slapping your face and slamming itself unto the entirety of your body. The great wind reached its arms and grabbed twigs, branches, and small stones and threw them at you. The sky will never be as blue as your bruises and the autumn soil will never be as red as your blood. And suddenly…

Aaaaaaaaeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaa…………..
You dropped to your knees and covered your ears with your soiled hands pleading for anyone who can hear to stop such ululation. You bent over, almost kissing the soil, cradled your head in between your legs and beseeched to anyone to stop such noise but it grew louder. Louder still.. Yet louder until you feel your head about to explode and it stopped… No resonance of leather on wood or rubber on cement… No incessant thudding of the heart… Not even the malicious laughter of the wind… Even the crippling scream ceased to exist…


And you thought solitude was peaceful…